When plans go awry

Alright, so, I didn’t end things with Marcus. It was not because I chickened out, but because I didn’t get to see him. I had to work late, I had an impromptu meeting that went on till it was almost 8 and I couldn’t make the movie. Meanwhile, he waited for me for over 3 hours! Needless to say he was upset. I felt really bad and I kept thinking to myself, “You had a date to go break up with someone you’re not even dating and didn’t have the decency to show up for the darn date!!!” Now I’m in appeasing mode! I’ve been apologising and now I’m hoping everything will just go downhill from here on… A friend of mine who knows of the whole Marcus drama says I should just get mad at him, I should find reasons to be upset, rant at him and then shut him out and keep forming vex! She says it’s the only way I’ll be able to let him go but I can’t do that, this is Marcus, he doesn’t deserve all that unnecessary drama… I was all set with my big girl pants yesterday to do what needed to be done but I think I lost the pants last night and with it went all my liver, mojo or whatever you want to call it. I hate when you have everything all planned out and then fate just decides, no way is that plan working! And screws all your plans and you’re left looking lost and bewildered like, what the hell just happened?!! I was in the perfect frame of mind to do this yesterday and I lost the opportunity now I have to strategize again! Anyways, right now I am just going to ride this out for today and avoid him, except perhaps to call once and apologise again for making him wait and not show up and then that’s it…. This makes me wonder though, is it really true then that men and women can’t be friends…? Just thinking… xoxo